Yesterday, I went with my son to a casting session for a commercial that would be aired on Korean TV. The faceless agent told me on the phone that it was only for my son and that, if chosen, he would be getting some cash for the part he played and which we would then put into a bank account for him to use sensibly when he was older.
Many people, especially friends, encouraged us to take both our children and get them into modeling because they were adorable and also the fact that it would be a good source of money for them. I was a little resistant at the beginning but then thought about using that money to open bank accounts in their names and teach them how to use money wisely.
While we were waiting, they asked me to fill out a form for him. I did as I was asked… After ten minutes they returned with another form and asked me to fill it with my own information. I was a little surprised and explained that I had only come here for my son and that I was not going to be participating. They said the role was for a family of two… I looked down at my son who was sitting beside me with inquisitive eyes. He asked me if I were to be with him… I had never done anything like this before but thought about how he must feel sitting on a wooden bench outside a cemented room with lights and cameras shinning down on him… It was his first time doing anything of the sort and so I decided to do this together and show him that there was nothing to be nervous about.
We went through the whole process… they put light make up on my face, put some pins in my hair, asked me to change my clothes… they asked my son to only change his clothes… I do not think I would have been very pleased if they suggested putting make up on him…
Anyway… I told my son to go with the flow as I was doing and just to have some fun with it… so we did our parts, and he was actually very good as I knew he would be (he loves acting and takes on so many different personalities… he loves being on stage too). We had to pretend that we were watching television (the camera being the TV), imagine that something came out of the TV which led us to jump back in our seats and say wow … then I had a line to say.
After an hour and a half we went back home in a taxi… not being the one who was driving, provided me with the chance to look outside my transparent rectangular screen at the city of smiles and the billboards passing me by… I saw so many faces which were all made up, looking beautiful… and I thought to myself…
Am I a somebody who wants to be a nobody?
Am I a nobody who wants to be a somebody?
Do I want to be either? … my mind raced trying to find what my deepest thoughts were about this and I came to the below conclusion…
I know that there are many celebrities who are somebody but they also want their privacy and wish that they were a nobody in the eyes of the world at certain times in their everyday lives. Why would they want people following them around with cameras, mics and notepads robbing them from some peace and quiet or a precious moment with their loved one? I would like to be known for something great… something that helped thousands of people… I would like to be known for touching people’s lives or making a difference… But I know for sure that I would not want to be followed everywhere and have my life made public…. so would I, because of that fame, want to become a nobody again?
If I chose the second question and thought about whether or not I am a nobody who wants to be a somebody, how would the people that I love feel about me saying this? I mean… am I really a nobody? … I am definitely a somebody in many people’s lives… family, friends, colleagues, and students’ lives… Do I know what it is truly like to be a nobody? Is there any such thing?
Can someone ever be a nobody?
Maybe… for example… a homeless person… It may sound harsh but hear me out… That person was definitely a somebody to many people at some point in his or her life… but maybe something happened that led him/her to live on the streets and in shelters… maybe then he would feel like a nobody… right? Having said that, I feel that many homeless people build a sense of community within their small circle… and so maybe slowly he will get to know other people and become a somebody to some again.
I do not think one can ever be totally a nobody.... you can never be a nobody to you…. You are a somebody to yourself…
What are your thoughts on this?